phase.

do you ever feel you really dont know why you are doing a certain thing for now?
no goal.
no feeling.
even no shadows of what it might be.
everything seems dull coz what u plan isn't really working out and it is extremely important to your life?

and you are wondering, "am i doing the right thing?"

paling penting, aku pernah tertanya2 kalau lah tuhan itu tidak wujud,
pada siapa kita hendak mengadu.
if any of your loved ones died, to whom would you complain and ask for sympathy?
if you had been in car accident and you lose your leg, forever, to whom would you beg?


about am-i-doing-the-right-thing i had think the consequence.
it will be the right thing if i do it sincerely and and make a lot of effort on what you are trying to do.

but, it will be the-not-right-thing if you do it with dark,dull and sick heart.

so, from my life, i just can conclude dark,dull,sick heart = not really knowing who are your god really is.

see the hook there? see the connection between

 doubtful am-i-doing-the-right-thing = your heart not close mentally and spiritually to Allah

faham tak?
faham tak?


the problem is with me,
i will repeat this thing like a flashback every single time i'm going through a phase of my life.

u understand aaa? ken? kenot? good.

 no one can help yourself unless you.

you too,yana.

stop whining and grab those books now.